Friday, January 25, 2013

Manipulation and Lies

I came across a resourceful website in my narcissistic research.  Melanie Tonia Evans.  Check it out.  Free ebooks. 

I'm not saying that the people I work with are narcissistic.  A lot of the behavior and expressions are the same, however.  I did not even realize, at least not on a conscious level, that their behavior fell into predictable patterns designed to discredit me, shift blame off them, and blur the issues.

---Telling me that I am too loud or my voice is "squeaky."
---Interrupting me constantly with non-urgent and irrelevant demands.
---Verbally berating me and when I walk away or tell them that I will not listen to their insults, yell that I am rude for not letting them finish their verbal assault, and then continuing.  When done, instead of waiting for my input, they declare the matter settled.
---Interrupting legitimate work/patient oriented discussion to advise the group that they are upset with me and then shifting the topic from the patient to themselves and their perceived emotional injury.
---Constantly telling me that they know what I think or feel (and it's not good).
---Telling me that nobody at work likes me and "everyone wants you fired."
---Telling me that I was seen out with -insert name here- and that both of us will be fired for violating workplace rules against dating [there aren't any such rules].

Same sayings:
"I'm sorry," and then repeating the same offending behavior.
"I'm sorry, but you are not perfect either.  You do this wrong . . ."
"You are the only person in this hospital who has a problem with this."
"You made me behave inappropriately."
"That happened yesterday.  The past is the past.  You need to get over it."

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